Why, yes I am - how good of you to ask!
We've been home since Saturday and things are going well. The Bug is slowly kicking the jaundice. I've also taken to calling her Mellow Yellow. She is the easiest baby ever. She almost never cries unless she's being weighed naked or bathed, these are the two things she cannot countenance. Otherwise she's gives a grunt and screws her face up until she looks just like Winston Churchill.
She does wake up every two hours all night long to feed and far from focusing on the sleep deprivation, I feel like the luckiest woman on earth every time I drag myself out of bed.
The Bean was sent home from school again today for nits (lice eggs) in her hair. Now, for those of you who were here for the first installment of lice-mania, these are almost certainly just leftover eggs from back then. It's hard to get every single nit off of a kid with longish hair.
But the school continues to find nits (which means nothing if you've treated the child - the eggs are dead) and continues their downhome Salem-style witchhunt. Their latest move was to hire a professional nit picker. I'm not kidding. If she finds nits, this pro nit picker will, conveniently, agree to pick your child certifiably free of nits for the low-low price of $85 an hour. And then that same pro nit-picker will be the one to inspect your child. I sense a conflict of interest here. I had no idea the lice eradication business was such a hotbed of cronyism.
The pro nitpicker also recommends using a powerful pesticide on your children and leaving it on for 3 times the recommended soak time. Ok, a little research by Mr. Kim (the microbiologist) found that the pesticide in this shampoo is the same as in Raid, but 3 times more concentrated. I don't think you need to be riding a Greenpeace boat that's ramming itself into whaling ships to think soaking Raid into a kid's scalp is a bad idea for the kid and planet.
And what are the public health concerns surround lice you may ask? Brilliant question. There are none. They are gross, but so far no one has ever been literally grossed out, medically speaking.
Now, a friend of ours from Sri Lanka told us that there they just get a monkey to pick you free of the lice. It's a real win-win because it's great for the kid (they get a monkey for a day!) and the monkey gets a buffet of proteinaceous snacks. It's the circle of life people. This seems like a great fundraiser for zoos. At this point most of the parents at the Bean's school would gladly clean a little poo off the walls of the family room in exchange for a nit-free child and a few precious days of sick leave salvaged.
1 comment:
Why on earth would anyone want to become a professional nit-picker?!?
I hope that you find a cheaper - and less chemically invasive way - to rid the Bean of her unwanted guests!
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